i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize