first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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