I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize