I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
PS: I just woke up from my shower
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
