i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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