Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
