I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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