dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
