Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.