I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Randomize
