4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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