you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
