its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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