Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize