I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
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