In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize