There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize