At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
