it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
