If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
