You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
