During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
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