I want to stick my p in your. b.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
