Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
