who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
