I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
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do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
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I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
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