when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
