One girl and one boy is just not enough.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
