Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
