I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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