you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
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