dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I think I am morally bankrupt
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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