she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
