I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I'm determined to sit on that face.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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