Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
