fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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