just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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