i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
