whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
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EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
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He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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