I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Randomize
