oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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