I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize