Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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