census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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