Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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