evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize