So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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