k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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