put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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