Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
Randomize
